The computer comes in very handy; I can be myself and express myself through my own words. I can keep contact with my family and friends. I can be in contact with the world and even make new friends. I can use it to keep a diary and start writing a book about my life.
It even comes in handy while communicating with my mother. There are things that are too difficult to spell out, especially when it is emotional stuff. I tend to get very emotional when it comes to things that touch the heart and speaking with your eyes becomes very difficult if they get small and fill with tears (it is my version of talking with a full mouth).
Therefore, certain things I would write to her in emails so the emotions would not get too high. This is something that I still do, not only with mom but also with Henning and my assistants.
Little did I know at that moment that the computer and internet would bring meaning to my life. It would give my life purpose for I can write and share my life with the whole world. The computer gave me a life and much more than that. It brought me love.
Being able to be myself and having an own voice made a huge difference. That machine gave me the weapons that I needed to fight depression, which are; my self-esteem and my self-confidence.